Everyone's Man – 49

 

"At least the two of you were thinking. That helps, but people talk," Keyes replied. "Or more to the point, they gossip. And these men have enough to lose that I wouldn't put it past them to plant someone at the hospital to listen. It's possible someone saw the two of you together when you left and wondered, especially if you're not in the habit of offering rides to anyone."

 

"Which I'm not," Marc admitted.

 

"Exactly. All it takes is a casually dropped word to another nurse, a doctor, or even between two of the janitors that work there and that could be just what those men need to figure it out."

 

Marc blew out a long breath, looking at Bill. "Colin should stay here then, if Dane's got the room."

 

"Maybe someone should ask me if I want to," Colin said sharply. "I am an adult, not a kid. I should have some say in this, I think."

 

Keyes tried to hide his surprise and hurt. "You're right. I can understand if you want to go back with them."

 

"I didn't say that. I just said I should be consulted instead of all of you talking about me like I'm not even in the room. This is my life and I know you're trying to keep me safe, but damn it, I want some input in the decisions."

 

"The pup has teeth," Marc said, grinning a bit.

 

Keyes winced. Colin chuckled, giving him a wide-eyed look back and batting his eyelashes.

 

"Am I missing something here?" Bill asked, puzzled.

 

"Not really," Keyes said quickly.

 

"Yes," Colin replied at the same time. "But it's an inside joke."

 

"Don't look at me," Marc told Bill when he did. "I haven't a clue."

 

Keyes smiled slightly as he looked at Colin. "Okay, 'pup', are you willing to stay here?"

 

Smiling back at him, Colin nodded. "As long as you don't tell me to heel or sit, yeah. I guess so."

 

Everyone's Man – 48

 

"By rights, we should all be down at the station so I can handle this officially," Keyes said, once Marc and Bill had arrived at his condo and had been filled in on the details.

 

"Wouldn't that be hard, considering who the man is?" Marc asked.

 

"It would, which is why we're here instead. I'm not about to tell my chief his son-in-law is a rapist until we have solid proof."

 

"So my word counts for nothing?" Colin said angrily.

 

"It counts for everything, in my book," Keyes replied. "But we have to be realistic. It will be your word against his when it comes down to it. And," he said, forestalling the question he knew Marc would ask, "unless we have outside proof, there's no way we can force him to give us a DNA sample to check against what we got from Colin and the second victim."

 

"So we're stuck in limbo," Bill muttered.

 

Keyes nodded. "To a degree, although there are things I can do. For one, I'll try to find out who's in his social circle, because I suspect at least some of them were also involved, up to and including the man who set the whole thing up."

 

"Is there any word about the three names we have from my contact online?"

 

"Not so far, and my people know to call me the moment they get anything."

 

By then, Colin had moved away from the others to stand at the window. He stared out over the darkening city. When Marc realized it and started toward him, Bill put a hand on his arm and shook his head. Marc started to protest, then realized that Keyes was already beside Colin, whispering as he put an arm around his waist. Colin stiffened visibly at the touch then seemed to lean back into it with a small nod of his head. It took a few minutes of quiet conversation before the detective brought Colin back, gesturing to the sofa. When Colin sat, Keyes was right beside him, one hand resting on his arm.

 

"I presume that man hasn't shown up at the hospital again," Keyes said, addressing Marc.

 

"Not that anyone's told me. I'm hoping he's decided I have no idea where Colin is and don't care. You were careful when you were there?"

 

"Very. I'm not about to let them find him on my watch."

 

"What happens when you start looking into the son-in-law, whoever he is? Will that send up red flags?"

 

Keyes felt Colin tense at the question and then relax when he rubbed his arm. "The guy's named Marcus Randall. I'm not planning on becoming his bosom buddy. However, I do know someone who can help me. A family friend."

 

Bill nodded. "So what can we do?"

 

"You two will do absolutely nothing," Keyes replied sternly, looking at Marc and Bill. "In point of fact, I'm tempted to make Colin stay here, just on the off chance that these men have figured out he's been at your place."

 

"How would they?" Marc asked. "It's not as if he's been in and out since he got there. Today's the first time he's left."

 

"We were very careful when I first left the hospital," Colin told Keyes. "I didn't even look like me. I was wearing scrubs and a cap and so was Marc. Well not the cap, but I was just like half the people that run around there."

 

Everyone's Man – 47

 

 

Marc glanced at the clock again. "They've been gone a long time. I hope everything's all right."

 

"If it wasn't, they'd have called," Bill pointed out before going back to the book he was reading.

 

"Unless Colin broke down again," Marc said. A worried frown creased his face as he sat down on the other end of the sofa.

 

"If he did, I'm sure Keyes can and will help him through it. Stop obsessing, Marc," Bill added somewhat tartly. "They're both adults. If they need us, they know where we are."

 

"Yeah, true. It's just hard to think of Colin as a grownup, sometimes."

 

"Well, he is," Bill growled. Then he sighed, closing the book. "Sorry, I'm being insensitive. I realize that you care what happens to him, but honestly he's probably safer and in better hands with Keyes than with us. I seriously think the detective has a much better understanding of what Colin's going through than we do."

 

"It's all right, we're both on edge." Marc rubbed his temples and then got up again. "I'm going to fix us something to eat. Any requests?"

 

"Let's see what's available first," Bill replied as he joined him. "Maybe we should make something that's long and involved, to take our minds off of things."

 

"And which of us has any clue how to make anything besides spaghetti sauce or stew?"

 

"That, my dear man, is what cookbooks are for, and we do own a couple of those."

 

Marc chuckled. "If we can find them under the dust they've accumulated. You look, I'll see what we've got to work with," he said, opening the fridge.

 

"Just no Brussels sprouts," Bill muttered at the same time that Marc's cell rang.

 

Marc answered and then listened, a frown deepening on his face from whatever he was hearing. He glanced over at Bill and nodded. "We'll be there as soon as possible. What's the address?"

 

"What's going on?" Bill asked when Marc closed his cell.

 

"They found out who one of the men was who raped Colin."

 

Everyone's Man – 46

 

 

Colin snorted as he walked past Keyes, wanting to look at the pictures Keyes had hanging along both sides of the narrow hallway. "Before I'm done with you, you'll be living in sweats, or at least jeans that look like you've owned them for more than a day," he tossed over his shoulder.

 

"Before you're done with me?" Keyes chuckled as he joined Colin in front of the row of pictures, impulsively ruffling Colin's hair.

 

Colin spun around, growling, swatting his hand away. "Don't touch the hair. It takes forever to get it just perfect."

 

"You are so kidding me."

 

An impish grin lit Colin's face. "Yeah I am, but it goes with the image. Right?"

 

Keyes looked him over, definitely amused. "Right. It fits the over-sized shirt and baggy sweats. You, Colin, need to go shopping."

 

"And you're going to take me?" Colin's face lit up in anticipation before it sobered. "Well, when I get hold of some cash that is."

 

"I can pay…" Keyes started to say, stopping when Colin glared at him. "Well, I could, and just call it a loan until you're back on your feet again."

 

"Maybe." Needing to get his emotions under control before he did something stupid, Colin turned back to the pictures. Most of them were of groups of men, the majority wearing police uniforms as they stood stiffly before the camera. "Guys you work with?" Colin asked.

 

"Yes." Keyes tapped one of the photos. "That's me, ages ago."

 

"You were young, and cute."

 

"Were? I think I'm insulted."

 

"Well you still are cute, in a handsome, rugged way," Colin replied with a laugh. He studied that picture for a moment before moving on. Then his body tensed. "That man," he pointed with a trembling finger. "Who is he?"

 

It was a photo obviously taken at some ceremony with cops lined up behind several men and women in civilian clothing. The one that had caught Colin's attention stood half in shadow at the end of the front row.

 

Resting a hand on Colin's shoulder, Keyes peered at the picture. "He's the police chief's son-in-law. Why?"

 

Colin's hissed between clenched teeth. "He was there that night. He's one of them."

 

"Colin, are you certain? It's not the best picture of him."

 

"Then find me a better one." Every line of his body was rigid with the need to stay in control as he turned to look at Keyes. "Because, yeah, I'm real sure it's the same man."

 

 

Everyone's Man – 45

 

 

They were half way to Keyes's car when Colin suddenly stopped short.

 

It took Keyes a moment to realize he had. "What's wrong?"

 

"Can we?" Colin worried his lip.

 

Keyes tilted his head in question, looking at Colin. "Can we what?"

 

"Go back up? I promise to behave and not be such an idiot. Besides, you haven't shown me everything." Seconds later he glanced down at Keyes crotch before looking up as him innocently.

 

"It wasn't you that was the idiot," Keyes growled before what Colin had done sank in. "No way. I've seen you like this before, after one of your episodes. I'm willing to let you see the rest of the apartment, but that's it."

 

Colin tossed his head back, laughing. "I actually didn't mean to do that until after the words were out. Then I couldn't resist. You should have seen the look on your face for a second there." He linked his arm with Keyes's, tugging slightly. "Come on, I honestly do want to see the rest and I promise to behave." Under his breath he whispered, "Or try to."

 

As Keyes was far from averse to spending more time with Colin, he agreed, despite the words he felt sure Colin didn't know he'd overheard. Despite or because of, he wasn't quite certain which, if he were going to be truthful with himself.

 

A few minutes later, he was showing Colin the well-appointed kitchen and asking if he wanted something to drink.

 

"Water, or soda if you have it," Colin told him. "You have a lot of stuff in here. Do you actually use everything?"

 

"Mostly, yes." Keyes checked the refrigerator, handing Colin a can of soda and taking out one for himself as well. "I'll freely admit some of the gadgets were impulse buys that I found out were more bother than they were worth when it came down to it."

 

"Isn't that called conspicuous consumption or something?"

 

"It's called I should keep my wallet in my pocket."

 

"That, too." Colin wandered out of the kitchen, drinking his soda as he looked around and then made a bee-line for the bedroom door. After opening it, he shook his head.

 

"Now what don't you approve of?" Keyes asked, coming up behind him.

 

"Nothing. It's just so…you."

 

Keyes stood at the door, trying to look at the room through Colin's eyes and had to agree. The bed was made, the dark green comforter spread across it without a wrinkle. Everything on the top of the oak dresser was laid out with almost military precision. "I'm really not this rigid, I don't think."

 

"Not rigid, just…" Colin shrugged. "Things have to be right for you to be comfortable. Even the way you dress is. You probably think it's casual, but who has jeans with a crease in them?"

 

"What's wrong with that?" Keyes asked in surprise.

 

"Do you even own something like sweats and a t-shirt?"

 

"Sure, for when I work out."

 

 

Sanctuary (Targeted #3) is out today!

 Sanctuary

Targeted #3

https://www.jms-books.com/edward-kendrick-c-224_229/sanctuary-p-4603.html

 

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0BRMHXSSZ

 

https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/sanctuary-edward-kendrick/1142908011?ean=9781685503598

 

https://www.kobo.com/us/en/ebook/sanctuary-330

 

GENRE: Gay Thriller Erotic Romance
LENGTH: 31,727 words
RATING:

Gale's sister Audra comes to him seeking refuge from her abusive husband Hank. With the help of Cal and Gale's other friends at The Three Bs club, they come up with a plan to keep her safe. In the process, Gale starts to realize he might be more interested in Cal than in the detective Cal had tried to push at him.

Then Hank shows up in town and confronts Gale at his apartment building. A fight ensues, ending with both men battered and bruised before Hank flees. Things might have ended there if Hank's body hadn't been discovered in an alley not far from the building.

With Gale as the obvious suspect in the murder, Cal does his best to prove otherwise, needing to help the man he's begun to care about beyond friendship. Can they find the real killer while coming to grips with their growing personal interest in each other?

EXCERPT:

When Gale arrived at the apartment building, he drove once around the block, looking for any sign of Hank. Finding nothing which said the man was in the area, he drove into the building's underground garage, parked, and took the elevator up to the ground floor so he could get his mail.

As he walked toward the bank of mailboxes, keys still in his hand so he could unlock his box, Gale thought he saw movement on the stoop outside the building. Then the front door opened and Hank Long came into the entryway. Gale was tempted to call the police but knew he had no grounds to report Hank was there. Hank saw him and began banging on the door to the lobby.

Gale took a deep breath and went over, but didn't open it.

"Where is she? I know she's here somewhere," Hank shouted.

Gale eased the door open a couple of inches, putting his foot against the bottom to keep Hank from pushing his way in. With feigned innocence, he replied, "Do you mean Audra?"

"Who else would I mean? She walked out on me and I know she would have come running to you. Where the hell are you hiding her?" Hank slammed his shoulder against the door, forcing Gale's foot back.

Gale opened the door just enough to step into the entryway, at which point the door swung shut and latched behind him. "Look, you bastard," he snarled. "She doesn't want anything more to do with you so get the hell out of here. Go home and lick your wounds, and forget about her. You don't deserve her and never did." At each word his temper rose, as much as he tried to rein it in.

"She's my wife. She belongs to me!" Hank shouted, rage suffusing his features. "Tell me where she is."

Then Hank made the mistake of taking a swing at Gale. Gale grabbed his arm with one hand, punching Hank's shoulder with the other. Hank twisted free and began to pound Gale's chest. Gale defended himself as best he could; managing to land a few hits on Hank's arms and torso in the process, getting the same in return. Then, a lucky punch hit Hank's jaw, staggering him backwards. When he smacked into the entryway wall, Gale was on him, raining blows on his head and body, pouring all his anger into them.

Hank fought back, one blow hitting the side of Gale's mouth. Gale was shocked to taste blood, realizing suddenly what he was doing -- what they were doing. "Stop it," he ordered. "Do you want someone to call the police?"

That seemed to get through to Hank. He lowered his hands, shaking his head as if to clear it, and scuttled to the front door. "Tell her she's mine and I don't let go of what's mine. This isn't over." With that, he swung the door open, exited, and raced down the path to the sidewalk. Gale saw him charge across the street and down to a car half a block away. It was too dark for him to tell anything about it other than it was a sedan of some sort, maybe blue or gray.

He dug into his pocket for his keys, realized he'd been holding them when the fight began, and found them on the floor a few feet from the lobby door. Retrieving them, he let himself in. Mail forgotten, he punched the elevator's UP button. It arrived a minute later, he got on, and then off at his floor.

When he was inside his apartment, with the door locked and the security system rearmed, he collapsed on the sofa to take stock of what had happened -- and what damages he's sustained. His body ached where Hank had hit him, and his mouth hurt. Running his tongue around, he was relieved to find all his teeth were still there, although there was a cut on the inside of his cheek where one of them had sliced it. He wiped his hand over his mouth to remove the last dribble of blood, and saw his knuckles were bruised, although not bloody, which surprised him.

Getting up, he started toward the bathroom when there was a knock on his door. A look through the peephole showed him it was Cal, with Audra right beside him, meaning Cal had picked her up as planned and brought her back to the building. He disarmed the security to let them in.

"Damn, I hope he looks worse than you," Cal said with a brief smile. "Hank, I'm presuming."

Audra was much more demonstrative, tears running down her face as she gave Gale a gentle hug and then began checking him out, as much as she could. "How, when, where?"

Gale wiped the tears from her cheeks before replying, "Downstairs." He gave them a quick recap of what had happened while assuring them he was all right. "I'll be sore for a while, but nothing's broken."

"Do you want to go to the hospital to make certain?" Cal asked.

"No. Honest, with a decent day's sleep I'll be fine. Or better, at least."

"Does he know I'm here?" Audra's voice trembled with fear.

"Nope. He thinks I'm helping you hide somewhere. I suspect he'll keep an eye on the building, anyway, but from the way he talked he has no clue."

"Thank God." She took his hand, frowning at the damage to it. "Like Cal said, I hope he looks and feels a lot worse."

 

Everyone's Man – 44

 

Keyes watched with amusement as Colin wandered around the large living room, checking everything out. When he passed the windows, Colin stopped and whistled in appreciation.

 

"You can see half the city from here. Nice."

 

"That's what really sold me on this place, all the windows and the balconies."

 

"There's more than one?"

 

"You bet. Here and off my bedroom."

 

Colin grinned. "You ever sleep on that one?"

 

"I could, I suppose, though I haven't. I'm partial to my creature comforts."

 

"I can tell." Colin glanced at the long, dark beige sofa and matching armchair in the center of the room; both facing the huge wide-screen television on one wall. Then he strolled over to the far wall to check out Keyes's collection of books. "Don't you read any fiction?"

 

"Not really. You do?"

 

Colin turned and nodded. "When I have time, yeah. It gets me away from real life." He chuckled. "I could so get into being a super spy."

 

Keyes tried not to laugh as he looked at the delicate young man. "You'd definitely throw everyone off the trail."

 

"Well, in my imagination, I'm a bit more 'manly'," Colin grumbled as he wandered away from the bookshelves.

 

"Now why would you want to change your image? You're cute and sexy, which would work if you're going to be a spy."

 

Leaning against the back of the sofa, Colin arched an eyebrow high enough that it got buried under his heavy bangs. "That seems to be how everyone sees me. They always have."

 

"Perhaps because it's what you are. There's not a damned thing wrong with it you know. I find it…" Keyes bit back the rest of his words, not wanting Colin to think he was trying to make a move on him. "Come on, I'll show you the kitchen."

 

"You find it what, Dane?" Colin asked, not budging from where he was.

 

Keyes hesitated before replying. "Appealing."

 

"That's what you say about a puppy when he gives you those big, sad eyes."

 

"There is that quality about you."

 

Hurt flashed across Colin's face. "Is that why I've become your pet project?" Pushing off the sofa with a scowl he walked to the front door. "Take me back to Marc's."

 

"Now just a damned minute, Colin." Keyes paced across the intervening space to look down at him. "You are not some project. If you were, I would have taken you back home already, not invited you here."

 

Colin stared up at him in confusion. "You said 'no strings'."

 

"And there aren't any. This was…" Keyes searched for the right words. "If I say a friendly invitation, you'll be back to thinking it was done out of pity or wherever your mind was taking you. If I tell you I find you interesting you'll still take it the wrong way."

 

"No shit." Colin's voice was tinged with anger but the look he gave Keyes was filled with something close to hope that he was reading the right things into Keyes's words.

 

"You have the puppy dog eyes down pat," Keyes told him with a slight grin

 

The scowl returned to Colin's face as he moved away. Keyes wasn't going to let that happen. He grabbed Colin's shoulders and held him where he stood. Immediately he realized that was the wrong thing to do when Colin froze, terror lining his young face and distrust welling in his troubled eyes. He dropped his hands instantly even though he wanted nothing more than to take Colin in his arms and do whatever it took to erase his fear. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have done that," he said softly.

 

Colin stared at him for a long moment, unseeing, before shaking his head to clear it. "Is it…will it always be like this?"

 

"Not if I can help it," Keyes replied gently, holding out his arms. When Colin didn't move into them he let them fall. "Come on, I'll take you home."

Everyone's Man – 43

 

Colin snorted. "Never had one of those. It's not something I do."

 

"Why the hell not?"

 

"Come on, Dane, who wants to be with a whore in a one-on-one relationship? Some men might think they could handle it, but in the long run they find one excuse or another to move on to someone who didn't fuck for a living. I've see it happen to guys I've known. I'm not willing to set myself up for…for heartbreak I guess."

 

"Damn, Colin, you don't know that would happen, or what you're missing by not allowing yourself to at least try."

 

"I'm finding out what I'm missing," Colin replied wryly. "I see it every time I look at Marc and Bill. Even with all the problems they have, they still love each other and make it work. But that's not in the cards for me." Having said that, he went quiet until the way Keyes had phrased his words hit him. "You're in a relationship." For some reason the idea hurt.

 

"I was. In the end, he couldn't handle that I was a cop, both because of the hours and he was too scared that something could happen to me." Keyes shrugged slightly. "He couldn't deal with that. I couldn't deal with his over-protective attitude."

 

"Ouch. Yeah that could be a real pain." Colin took a bite of his steak, laughing when Keyes shuddered. "I like it rare."

 

"Did they even cook it?" Keyes asked as he dug into his lobster.

 

"Yeah, see, charred on the outside, bloody on the inside. Not like the shoe leather you have on your plate."

 

"Medium-well is not shoe leather, thank you very much. Try the lobster. It's fantastic."

 

"Umm," Colin looked embarrassed.

 

"Don't tell me, you don't like lobster. So why did you order it? Oh…" Keyes chuckled. "You were testing me."

 

"Yeah, sorry. You said order anything. I needed to see if you meant it. I mean, you're a cop, you can't really be too rich, despite the car."

 

"Actually, I am. The same person who willed me the car left me a bit of money too."

 

"How much is 'a bit'. Naw, never mind it's none of my business."

 

"Let's just say if I quit my job tomorrow, I could still live quite comfortably."

 

"Must be nice. You have a small mansion somewhere in the city?"

 

"Sure." Keyes laughed. "No, of course not. I'm a cop, I live like one. Besides I'm not really into all the fancy stuff. I grew up middle-class and I'm happy enough to keep living like that over all."

 

"Apartment or house?"

 

"Umm, condo?"

 

"That's middle-class?"

 

"Why does everyone equate condos with wealth? It's just a fancy name for owning your own apartment and paying fees to the HOA to keep the building maintained."

 

"Sounds pretty sweet to me. Better than the places I've lived by a long shot. Well, at least since I left home anyway."

 

"It's nice enough." Keyes leaned back, looking at Colin appraisingly. "Do you want to see it?"

 

"Seriously? Sure." Colin took another bite of steak before asking, "No strings?"

 

"No strings, I promise."

 

Everyone's Man – 42

 

 

"The hell you did," Keyes growled angrily. "Look at me, Colin." Colin hesitated before lifting his gaze once again to meet Keyes's. "I know you've been told this before. It's time you started believing it. No one ever asks for, or deserves to be, raped. Never."

 

"I did," Colin retorted, his eyes brimming with tears. "I'm a whore, Dane. It's what happens to us. We get paid to have sex with someone and sometimes…" He wiped away a tear that trickled down his face. "I heard a saying once that describes me to a T. I'm everyone's man. If they have the money, I'm theirs to do with as they wish."

 

"But you don't let them do everything they want, or your attacker wouldn't have come looking for you again to… Well in his mind, I think he looked on it as punishing you because you defied him and ran. He was probably afraid you'd tell someone about him." Keyes touched Colin's jaw with one finger to keep him focused on what he was saying. "What he—what they—did to you, Colin, was not punishment. It was rape, pure and simple. Non-consensual sex. Until you are able to accept, not only here," Keyes tapped Colin's temple, "but emotionally as well, that it was not your fault, you won't begin to heal."

 

"How do I do that, Dane?" Colin asked, his eyes pleading for an answer.

 

"You make that your mantra, Colin. When the feelings begin to overwhelm you, when you have flashbacks about what happened, you tell yourself you were not responsible. You tell yourself that they are sick bastards who used you. Rape is not about sexual gratification: it's about exerting power and control over someone else. It's a crime of violence, not in any way, shape, or form a sexual act, except for the fact that a cock or some other form of penetration is the used."

 

"You make it sound so…so easy."

 

"Fuck no it's not easy! It's damned hard." Keyes's voice rose and he quickly tempered it. "I still have times when I question it, Colin, and it happened a long time ago."

 

Colin nodded, a frown deeply creasing his forehead.

 

"What?" Keyes asked quietly.

 

"Nothing," Colin told him. "Nothing."

 

At that moment the waiter arrived to set their meals down in front of them. When he left, Keyes said, "Colin, don't do that. Don't internalize. Ask anything you need to and I'll answer."

 

For a long moment Keyes thought Colin was going to ignore him when he turned his attention to his food. Then he looked up, asking hesitantly, "Do you… have sex?"

 

Keyes smiled. "Yes. Now. It took time before I was able to handle even the idea of being with anyone sexually. Then, for a while, it was an aggressive act on my part, trying to show the man I happened to be with that I was the one in control." When Colin's eyes widened in shock, Keyes quickly amended his statement. "The sex was consensual but I had to be the one instigating it and it had to be done my way."

 

"That sort of won't work for me." Colin sighed deeply.

 

"If you're hooking, no it won't, obviously. In a personal relationship, hopefully the male you're with will understand."

 

Everyone's Man – 41

 

 

Colin nodded, lowering his gaze to stare at the tabletop. "So it looks like I may be out of the business," he muttered more to himself than to the detective.

 

"For a while, yes. Is that so bad? Maybe you'll find something better, safer, to do instead."

 

Colin looked back  at Keyes. "I like what I do. I thought I made that clear. One little glitch is not going to change that."

 

"Glitch, Colin?"

 

"Okay." Colin looked around to be certain no one was close enough to overhear them. "Glitch, rape, same thing. Right?"

 

"Wrong." Keyes hesitated before reaching out to take Colin's hand. "I'm sure Marc and Bill have done the best they can to see you through your…issues…and that's all to the good. You need people who care about what you're going through. But they can't really understand it because it hasn't happened to them."

 

"So you're saying I need to get counseling. Not happening. I'm doing just fine, I'll get past this." He tried to pull his hand away, but Keyes wouldn't let him.

 

"What you need, Colin, is to talk to someone who has an understanding about rape and what comes afterwards."

 

"A shrink."

 

"That's one option, yes, if you can find a decent one. That's not that easy to do."

 

"But you just happen to know the name of one you'd be happy to refer me to," Colin replied caustically.

 

Keyes shook his head. "I never found one."

 

Colin studied the handsome, dark-haired detective's somber face before nodding slowly. "And you needed one."

 

"It would have helped," Keyes replied, acknowledging the question behind Colin's words.

 

"How long ago, Dane?"

 

"Five years." He looked down at their hands, squeezing Colin's tightly for a moment. "It gets better, but it takes time."

 

"May I ask something?"

 

"Sure. What?"

 

"Were you…was it random?"

 

"It was the result of gay-bashing, which probably answers your next question, too. Three men who objected to my 'lifestyle' as they put it."

 

"Do your…do the cops you work with know?"

 

Keyes chuckled softly. "Yes and no. Some of them know I'm gay. None of them know I was raped. After it happened, I took some leave time to try to heal. Then when I came back, I threw myself into my work as a way of forgetting. I did that well enough that I earned my gold shield."

 

"But Marc said something about you working a lot on rape cases like mine. Doesn't that sort of throw it in your face on a daily basis?"

 

"Yes, but because of what happened I also have an insight into what the victims are going through. I like to think that maybe I make things just a bit easier for them because I'm not treating them as if they asked for what happened to them."

 

"I did," Colin said under his breath, his eyes downcast.