Never Again – 8

 

"Where are we going?" Rawleigh asked, looking at the two horses standing ready in the stable.

"For a ride," was all Joseph replied sharply when he mounted his, tightening the reins to keep the horse from shying away as he did.

Mounting the other horse, Rawleigh cocked an eyebrow. "For any special reason?"

"Yes," he growled in reply.

"Secrets, Joseph?"

"Only for an hour longer." He softened his tone. "I promise."

Rawleigh's mouth tightened in obvious frustration but he said nothing, just following Joseph as they cantered down the street to the river then east out of Richmond. Soon they were deep into a wooded area. Signs of one of the battles earlier in the year surrounded them, some blasted trees, still-trampled ground, but eventually that gave way to a less damaged area. Finally, Joseph came to a stop and dismounted.

By now it was dark, only the full moon above them lighting the small glade. After tethering their horses, Joseph pointed to a fallen log well away from them. "Please, sit and listen. What I have to tell you…" He took a deep breath. "Just believe I am not lying or saying this with the intent of driving you away from me."

The worried, almost panicked look on Rawleigh's face as he sat did little to alleviate Joseph's fears that he would soon lose the man he loved. His sister was correct, however, he could no longer keep his secret to himself.

Hands now gripped tightly behind his back, Joseph paced the glade. "I don't know how to begin," he said quietly. "There is something about me I have to tell you if our love is going to survive. And yet, if I do, you may hate me or think me insane." Pain colored his words but he forced himself to continue. "You've seen much these past few years—war, death, destruction beyond belief. Through it all you've grown and become an exceptional human. A human I love more than I ever thought possible. More than I should have allowed, for both our sakes."

"A strange way to phrase it, Joseph, to call me a human, not a man."

"I know, but from my perspective that's what you are. A human."

"And you're not?" Rawleigh said with a soft snort of amusement.

"No." Joseph looked at him with pain-filled eyes. "I am… more than human."

Rawleigh returned his gaze, his look full of questions. "What does that mean, more than human? Do you think you're—" he paused, "—a god? An angel fallen from Heaven? A demon come up from Hell? What, Joseph? Tell me. What do you think you are?"

"It's not what I think but what I know. I'm not delusional, Rawleigh, although at the moment I'm sure you don't believe it." He turned away to resume pacing. "In this world there are many creatures. Most of them you and everyone else know about. Some, a very few…" Joseph hesitated, frowning deeply. "For us it's not safe if we reveal ourselves. People would not understand. We know that from past experience. We are an anathema, something to be hunted and killed without remorse." He spun around, staring at Rawleigh. "You may want to kill me when I show you what I am."

"I could never kill you, Joseph. If you were Satan himself I could never kill you. I love you. So… show me." Rawleigh's voice trembled as he spoke, but he remained where he was, not attempting to flee from whatever his lover was going to do.

Joseph first undressed then came to kneel before Rawleigh, crouching on all fours. He took a deep breath then began to transform. For a moment it seemed as if nothing was happening. Then slowly his hands and feet grew, lengthening, changing into massive paws. His jaw lengthened as well, expanding forward, taking on a lupine shape with sharp, pointed ears set on the top of his head. His shoulders broadened, his back narrowed down to thick, muscular haunches. Soon fur covered his body, a thick coat of black fur, blending down to a deep gray, and to pale gray across his muzzle. His tail, when it appeared, was full and bushy, pure black, tipped with gray.

Rawleigh watched with a mixture of terror and wonder on his face. Slowly, ever so slowly, he reached out one hand to touch the wolf, drawing it down over his muzzle, tension defining his every move. "If I hadn't seen it with my own eyes I would not have believed it possible," he said in a shaky voice.

The wolf nuzzled his hand.

"You are quite… remarkable, handsome, incredible, and… and fearsome. Can you change back? And that sounded stupid. Of course you can. Will you, Joseph? Please."

The wolf nodded and soon it was Joseph crouching there, looking up at Rawleigh. "Are you going to run now, from the aberration that is me?" he asked, his voice taut with fear while he waited for Rawleigh's reply.

Slowly, Rawleigh shook his head. "I could. Perhaps I should. But I won't. As strange as this may sound, seeing you like that, knowing you trusted me enough to show me what you truly are, makes me love you more, not less."