Sunday, March 11, 2018

(36) I am what I am


The door swung open and my demon stood there. A look of surprise crossed his face, and then a lewd, knowing grin as without a word he grabbed my arm and pulled me inside, slamming the door closed behind us.

“So you finally realized you belong here with me, boy. It took you long enough,” he growled, gripping my other arm as his eyes raked over me.

I didn’t try to pull away. I knew what would happen if I did. Instead I looked up at my stepfather’s brutal face and shook my head. “I don’t belong here. I came to…to…” I couldn’t help it, I started to stutter. I always did when I tried to tell him something I knew would make him mad. I willed myself to continue. “I came to tell you that you’re to stay out of my life from now on or else.” The words spilled out in a rush.

“Or else what, boy?” His anger and dark amusement were written on his face and in way his hands tightened even farther on my arms. “Going to set the cops on me like the last time? You’ll notice I’m still here. They believed me when I told them you were crazy and that that’s why you’d run away. A crazy little fag who hated me for trying to straighten you up. Spreading malicious lies about me.”

Before I could say another word he backhanded me so hard I saw stars. Then he dragged me towards the stairs. “We have a lot of time to make up for, boy. You cost me a lot, making me search for you and then vanishing before I caught you.”

As he continued to drag me along, not caring that I was barely able to walk, he continued his rant. “I finally decided it was time to show you that you belonged to me and no one else. Not that fool doctor, not that man you let pick you up at that rancid fag club, not the boys you came on to on the street that night. You’re mine boy. So I did what any loving father would do, I eliminated them. Sent a message too. Did you like that one, boy? Shoving their cocks up their asses. Fucking sex fiends thinking they could have my boy.”

Wave after wave of horror rolled over me as I listened to him. “You…you…” I was shaking so hard, was so afraid, I couldn’t get the words out.

“I killed them, of course I did.”

We were at his bedroom door then. He threw it open and hauled me across the room to his bed. Then he grabbed my hair in one hand and the back of my neck with the other. “Strip,” he ordered. “And then we’ll get down to the business of making sure you remember that you’re mine.”

I did strip. It was as if I was his sex toy again, obeying his every order because I was terrified of what would happen if I didn’t. When I was standing naked in front of him he shoved me face down onto the bed, holding me there with one hand pressed onto my back. I heard the sound of his belt as he removed it, and then the snick of his zipper going down and his pants hitting the floor.

And I screamed.

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