Guardian Angels – Ambivalent - 21

Why the hell did I open my big mouth? Paddy chastised himself while he and Mike walked to the shelter. As they did, he kept his eyes and his internal senses open for any sign of Mr. Keefe. Not that he expected the man to pop out and take potshots as Mike. If he was a professional, and everything pointed to that, he wouldn't be that stupid. Paddy had the idea that Keefe was supposed to make Mike's death look like an accident, if what he'd done to Micky was any indication.

Kill him in a way that won't point back to whoever hired him.

It was Paddy's primary job to keep that from happening. The problem was the way he'd set it up—suggesting he'd stay with Mike. He was becoming quite fond of his young charge. More than fond. Hell, whoever came up with that word was looking for a euphemism for liking someone more than they should.

Not that liking him that way will do me a whole hell of a lot of good. In the first place it's absolutely forbidden. And Samuel would be damned good and sure I never got to see Mike again once this is over. Besides which… Paddy covertly watched Mike as they walked. Dia uilechumhachtach (God almighty), Pádrig O'Brian, get a grip as Dave would say. Mike's not the least bit interested in me except as someone who can help him find and stop Keefe. Hell even if I was human and the age I appear to be, I'm too old for him to see as anything other than… than a man who's been hired to keep him safe.

* * * *

Mike could almost feel Paddy watching him. It made him nervous, which surprised him. After all the two of them had spent a great many hours together in relatively short time they'd known each other. Most of it pretty intense what with Mr. Keefe and all. So why, now that I'm used to Paddy being around, is it bothering me that he's going to be staying with me night and day.

He took a quick glance at his bodyguard. I guess he's my bodyguard now. At least that's how I've been thinking of him. He's not bad looking for his age. Mike chuckled, shaking his head when Paddy looked at him in question. Hell, he's not really that old. He's just… World wise? Worldly? Something like that. I wonder why he keeps his hair so long. Maybe so he'll feel younger? It looks good on him. Enough of that. Even if he is interested in me, am I interested in him?  

That was a question Mike had no real answer for, he realized. Yes, he found he liked Paddy. Liked his…friendship. Liked that he'd come into his life despite the circumstances surrounding why he had. But beyond that… If he walks away when this is over will I wish he hadn't? On some level, of course I will. I don't have all that many friends. Losing one will leave a void. But is that all it will do? Will I always wonder 'what if'? What if he hopes we can become more than friends but does nothing because I don't allow it. What if I make the first move and he reciprocates? What if he doesn't? Do I want to see what could happen? Do I see him as possibly more than just a friend? I don't know!

* * * *

Paddy would have given just about anything to know what was on Mike's mind that had him looking so serious—and so puzzled at times. He could have found out. He had that ability given what he was. But he was not going to pry into the young man's thoughts. After all, I might not like what I saw.

He smiled wryly to himself before saying, "You look like you have the weight of the world on your shoulders. Stop worrying. We're going to catch Keefe, with Detective Massey's help, and then our lives can get back on track again."

"You go your way, I go mine?" Mike replied with a trace of regret. Or so it sounded to Paddy.

"Probably, once Keefe is in jail and we find out who hired him."

Mike nodded. "I'm not so sure I want to know that. If it was Mandy… It can't be. She loves me. Or she did." He sighed. "I suppose Vic was right. She could hate me now, since Father left everything to me."

"It is possible. Or it could be another relative, or…who knows who else."

"There's no one else who would profit from my dying. I don't have enemies damn it. I'm not that kind of guy. Hell, I don't have many friends so how could I have enemies?"

Paddy chuckled. "I'm not sure the two are mutually exclusive but I get your point." He put his arm around Mike's shoulders. "We will find out though, one way or another."

Paddy was surprised when Mike didn't immediately pull away, instead just replying, "God I hope so." He was sorely tempted to leave his arm where it was but didn't. No sense in asking for trouble.

By then, they were close to the shelter. When they turned the corner Mike sighed in relief. "I was half expecting to see police cars again."

"I know. I was too," Paddy admitted.

"I hope we never do again. Well other than the occasional one that shows up when the cops are looking for someone. Although I'd rather that didn't happen either. But given who stays with us it's inevitable from time to time."

"I'm sure, unfortunately. Okay, let's get in there and hope it's not quite as chaotic as the last couple of days have been."