“Damn, damn, damn, this is
fricking freezing,” Race bitched as he stepped closer to the center of the
stream.
Shan watched in amusement
for a second, until the younger man started to unwrap the towel. Then he turned
away, leaning his back against a tree by the edge of the stream as he listened
to Race’s steady swearing, and heard the towel hit the grass by the side of the
stream. “You’re not going to die,” he called over his shoulder.
“Is this what the shower
water’s going to be like?” Race asked as he soaped up and did the best he could
to wash off the dirt without turning into a permanent ice cube.
“Nope. I’ll set a bit of
magic to warm it.”
“Set a lot, I like hot
showers.”
“Don’t push it kid, or
you’ll be taking cold ones.” He stared off into the trees, concentrating on the
view in front of him to avoid thinking about the one behind him. Therefore he
didn’t hear the soft rustling of the grass by the stream until it was too late.
Suddenly he found himself flat on his ass in the icy water looking up at an
impishly grinning face.
“You little fucker,” Shan
growled, grabbing Race’s hand to pull him down into the water as well.
“Told you you needed a bath
too,” Race said unrepentantly.
“And you need to learn to
respect your elders,” Shan grumbled as he started to get up.
With a tug Race stopped him.
“I respect the hell out of you. That’s the problem.” He traced a finger over
the line of Shan’s jaw.
Shan shivered, and it wasn’t
from the cold. “Don’t, Race.”
“’Don’t, Race’, ‘Stop it
Race’. Well for your information, you’ll have to send me home if you want that
to happen. I’m not a kid, Shan. I knew what I wanted from the first moment I
saw you. I’ve done my best to push that away because I knew I was battling a
ghost.” He touched Shan’s cheek. “I probably still am, but not so much so, I
think. Not now. I’m real sure you’re still not ready yet, but when you are…I’m
here.” Putting his hands on Shan’s shoulders he stood, bent to brush a kiss
across the shocked man’s lips and then stepped out of the stream. Snagging the
towel, he wrapped it around his waist and strode off.
Shan was on his feet seconds
later. “Stop right where you are,” he ordered.
“Why? So you can tell me
what a fool I just was?” Race continued walking, although not so quickly now.
Catching up with him Shan
grabbed his arm, swinging him around to face him. “You weren’t a fool. You have
every right to feel the way you do about … everything.”
“But you don’t feel the
same, and you probably won’t. So yeah, I was a fool.”
Shan shook his head slowly.
“Just what makes you think I don’t find you,” he paused as if searching for an
appropriate word, “well, interesting?”
“Interesting? Like a new
food you’re not sure if you like or not, or a story someone tells? I’m not
certain I want to be ‘interesting’.”
“No. Interesting like I’d
like to get to know you better and perhaps see what happens. I’m just not about
to rush into anything. Truthfully,” he cupped his hand under Race’s chin,
slowly stroking his thumb over his lips, “I’m scared shitless,” he said
quietly.
“Do you think you’re the
only one who’s scared?” Race replied just a quietly, thrilling at Shan’s touch.
He searched Shan’s face. “I know I can never replace him, I would never try. But
if I could just be in some small part of your life as…as more than just a
friend.” He dropped his gaze, not willing to see rejection if it was there.
“If we…Damn it.” Shan
released his hold on Race. “I couldn’t handle loosing someone else.”
“There’s always that danger
when you care for someone. You just have to decide if caring is worth the
risk.” Race stepped away. “One thing, Shan, I won’t let myself be just a casual
fuck for you. So you need to decide, can I be more or should we let this drop
right now and pretend nothing was said. Your choice.” With that stated, he
continued on to the Compound, disappearing from sight into the tunnel.
Some thinking needs to be done I see. Amazing installment
ReplyDeleteThank you for the compliment. Greatly appreciated.
DeleteFantastic. Race is finally stating his facts.
ReplyDeleteSometimes you have to, if you want something badly enough.
Delete